Enlightenment.

So, I have not written for some time. In that time, many things have happened to me.

The first, and probably most important, is that I have enjoyed the largest sexual encounter of my entire life. It was about what I expected in many ways, but in others it fell short. We spend our lives obsessing over these things, and by the time they get here, they are sometimes not what you wanted them to be way back in the beginning. Anyway, it doesn't matter. What matters, is that after this, I woke up the next day with such a perfect view of the world. I hesitate to call it enlightenment.

That day was roughly two weeks ago, and since then I have enjoyed even more fun with the woman that I originally shared the experience with, and it has been pleasurable in the manner of such things. But throughout all of this, I have not lost the vision that I woke up with that morning. This vision is beautiful, the world is grand. I see now why there is happiness, and sadness, and every manner of everything inbetween. There is nothing good and evil, but thinking makes it so.

The extent to which a person is happy is not based on his circumstances, his achievements, his goals, or any other physical thing that this earth can give him or her. Happiness and sadness are constructs of the mind, and should be treated as such. The only thing that can make you happy is your mind, and to seek happiness from alcohol, drugs, sex, or any other physical activity is useless. These things don't change the mind, or if they do they do so temporarily.

A priori, man is happy or sad in his own mind. This happens regardless of circumstances, regardless of anything outside the self. I have been in situations where I have been crying and sad, yet at the same time I was happy, because A priori my life is beautiful. When people try to say that sadness is sad, and happiness is happy, they are lying. There is only the mind of the person, which makes each and every thing into something beforehand. The people of today seem to think that it is that which is A posteriori which is true, but they are wrong. Man can make anything of anything, based on that which is A priori in his mind, and that is where the source is.

In my ethics class, we studied an excerpt about the experience machine, a matrix-like device that can provide you with experiences of your choosing for a specified time, before you exit and you repeat the process. Virtually everyone in the class denied that they would use this machine, but their only comeback is that it is simply "because it isn't real". Someone did manage to bring up the idea that perhaps this is our life, and how is there any difference? How would we know? What they did not come upon, was the truth.

The truth is, no one would use the experience machine because it would not change a thing. The experience machine gives you the ability to change your circumstances, but not your inner self. For this reason, everyone who is unhappy would continue to be so, and everyone who is happy would also continue to do so. There is no reason to plug in, because nothing would change. There is another reason why they wouldn't do it: because deep down, they know this. They refuse to believe it, but if they went into the machine they would be forced to understand that they are flawed individuals with no way to improve themselves artifically.

A priori, life is beautiful, everything happens for a reason, nothing is wrong. This is my style. I am ALWAYS HAPPY. Even when I'm sad.